You have to take a moment to read this poem by my ever so talented friend! It's Freaking Funny! Gina Kershner
Twas the night before christmas and all through the house I was running with scissors not wearing a blouse. The baskets were hung by the chimney with care with hopes that the easter bunny soon would be here. It was not too long that halloween was just here, I thought I would have time for some holiday cheer. With wine in my hand and a cat on my lap, not able to shop not giving a crap. While cruising the stores full of tinsel and balls, I think it's too early to be decking the halls. I was just making cupcakes with sweet candy corn and found overnight that christmas was born. I was licking the cake batter off of my beaters, and patiently waiting for more trick or treaters. When what to my wondering eyes should appear but another glass of wine and eight tiny reindeer, now dopey, now happy, now grumpy, and doc, gimme a break i just changed my clock. wine still in hand and cat in my lap, I'm stilll not ready for that long winter nap. the weather still warm still wearing flip flops, bunnies on the lawn still doing their hops. Then in the kitchen there rose such a clatter, another glass of wine so it really won't matter. I am worried I won't get my turkey on time cause shoprite has put a limit on mine. Thanksgiving will come and go like a blur then all of a sudden all is covered with fur. Another glass of wine is all i have said while visions of leprechauns danced in my head. I lay on my couch feeling bereft, i know when i shop there will be nothing left. now feeling the wine and being confused, the reality of it all , I am not too amused. The leaves are still falling and hitting the ground, stop rushing the holidays, make it slow down. People are rushing to get here and there, pushing and shoving without even a care. I never thought i could feel so complacent, but another glass of wine and i know i can face it. stop shoving the holiday's down in my throat it's way too early so please make a note. I watch hallmark movies with hope to gain spirit, knowing for real that Santa won't hear it. I thank god for amazon and last minute gifts cause it's the week before christmas i depend on for it. I can not send cards and pictures and such, it all sounds so nice but it costs me so much. Another glass of wine in my hand, hoping safely in my bed I land, with dreams of family, neighbors and friends, please know we are here with a hand to lend. We are not rich with money or gold but always are here with a hand to hold. feel free to come by for some holiday cheer, but please wait until christmas really is here. while laying my finger to the side of my nose, I am having more wine getting rid of my woes. As I lay myself down for a long winters night, Happy Birthday to all and to all a good night. Merry Christmas, WAAAAAY toooo EARLY.